Oh my god im daddys little princess! - keith price when his dad told him to get a rich husband
Ask for a hotel and some food cause if youre going to be on the dl aint no sense being hungry - keith price
Does your wife know youre out chasing men at the burlington coat factory - keith price
hes going to have a hard time– mimi when i told her that my friend and i want to have a baby if im unmarried at 35 and name it after my great grandfathers - jasper and florence or atlee
me - he has a mouth infection he stayed home sick today
mimi - he stayed home sex today?!
You look like you work in a Hassidic meth lab– Natalie Portman to Ben Stiller-As-Joaquin Pheonix (via misfittoys) (via danhacker)
If Harvey had not been taken from us 30 years ago, I think he’d want me to say...– Dustin Lance Black (via shiningstar)
i dont like this format. just say the names and show me a clip!
put those things away
my friend went to school with meryl’s daughter my male friend got hit on by langella—-soo methinks that he liked hugh on his lap
New Posts! →
laundry, nail painted, watched unc game, watched graduates, blogged, and now heading to dinner for james’ bday
theres a demolished bird in my yard
You go, Glen Coco.– (via molls) (via shiningstar)
New gossip from ME →
Check out my new articles on examiner.com, covering Jay McCarroll, Rihanna, Lindsay Lohan, and the like!
friday night. internet. cough. tv. blogging on examiner.com.
Brian banana duck sunshine yellow
It’s the magic of risking everything for a dream that nobody sees but you.– Million Dollar Baby (via littlemiss) (via shiningstar)
recap: friday babysat the adorable penelope, watched bee movie, and played with toys saturday was spent lazing about and doing laundry before heading to dinner at new ashiya with friends and hitting up dba, 2a, and doc hollidays sunday was spent at a tasty brunch before going to the target thing on west street and the keith harring exhibit, then dinner with joan at big daddys today we went to...
Upper west side adventure
dinner with brian robbie shannon joan mike alana jessica erin maybe leah and eric plus alan lindsay and god knows who else all you can drink and eat sushi!
colonel: were going to an oyster roast with 8 couples tonight
me: are you wearing a mask? is everyone going to go in the dunes and feel around?
colonel: they sent us the email then another one 2 minutes later saying no swinging.
onemoretimewithfeeling: littleorphanammo: dogganghappened: sade: Today, I gave my girlfriend non-alcoholic beer as a joke. In slurred speech she tells me I have the body of a monk seal. She then takes my keys, staggers to my car, and drives away. She crashed into a tree 2 blocks later. She’s fine. FML (via fmylife.com)(via partyfoul)
I bang the worst dudes (Sorry, Mom) →
dylicious: jonoh: True stories about the mistakes everyone knows they’ve made. Gah this site is ALMOST as good as FML.
adeandabet: janieblue84: mysteriosa: fmylife: Today, my boss called me into his office to show me the web site of a potential business partner. When he began to type ‘virginia’ into google, it auto-completed his search with his recent search for ‘virgin boy assholes’. I have to go on business trip with him tomorrow. I’m a young guy. FML HAHAHA. GOOGLE FAIL.
Do yourself a favor
megwhyte: DO NOT do a Google Image search for “Mountain Dew Mouth”… it might be worse than Meth Face. did someone else watch 20 20 last night?